Game over (until it gets cold again)

Well, that is quite enough Come On Jimmy for one season I think. Snooker has no place when the sun is shining outside. Even the Grand Master's snooker group disbands over the summer (after the all important 'Wives and Girlfriends night' of course). As soon as the snooker is back on the telly, sometime like November, I will write some more snooker-related guff. This time I may have the red button at my disposal, then you really will be in trouble.

I will leave you with this excellent article by Simon Barnes of The Times, who puts the whole thing better than I ever could:

www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/columnists/simon_barnes/article6128484.ece

Come On Jimmy!

Wrigglers

I have noticed some excellent additional slang creeping in this year. There are some special terms commonly used amongst my immediate cue sport circle when a ball does that wriggly thing where it hits both edges of the pocket and then goes in.

My favourites are:

• It wriggled
• It wiggled
• It wiped its feet
• It went in off the post
• It thought about it

You get the idea. This year these have been joined by the excellent 'It knocked three times' coined by John Virgo during the Shaun Murphy vs John Higgins match. Great work Virgo, I am one step closer to forgiving your life-long affiliation with that tit Jim Davidson.

UPDATE: One additional wriggler comment from the Grand Master - "It entered through the side door". Great work.

Australians and snooker

I am very pleased to see 'The Thunder from Down Under'* Neil Robertson doing well in the World Championship. So far he is doing a very good impression of Alex Higgins / Jimmy White, by falling short positionally very regularly and having to tonk it around the table to make up for it. My kind of player. He is also playing Shaun Murphy who is a frankly odious individual.

But why on earth would you play snooker if you were Australian? It's bad enough in the Spring and Summer in the UK - staying in a dark room when the sun is shining seems so wrong. Australia is just not a country suited to the baize. Also, about three quarters of the tournaments are in the UK. Neil Robertson seems to be holding it together but Quinten Hann drove himself mad from the jetlag, eventually giving in and just starbursting the reds. That was proper fun, and (as described elsewhere in this blog) can be a psychological tactic unlike any other in the amateur game, snooker clearly drove him mental.

On another note, Dennis Taylor shamed himself on last night's commentary with a terrible Australia pun. The Thunder (tm) had the white on the cushion and needed to dig one it out with some backspin. Dennis mentioned that he was probably good at digging seeing as he'd come all the way from Australia.

Only a lifetime ban from the BBC can set the proper example to other commentators to ensure this doesn't happen again.

*Best new snooker nickname this year.